Redneck medical terms...

I found the following while cleaning house yesterday and thought I'd share it here to hopefully bring a smile to your face, even though, I know, it's quite silly! :)

Artery.............the study of paintings
Benign.............what you be after you be eight
Bacteria...........back door to cafeteria
Barium............what doctors do when patients die
Cesarean section........a neighborhood in Rome
Catscan............searching for kitty
Cauterize........made eye contact with her
Colic................a sheep dog
Coma..............a punctuation mark
Fester.............quicker than someone else
Fibula.............a small lie (is there such a thing?)
Hangnail........what you hang your coat on
Labor pain............getting hurt at work
Medical staff........a doctor's cane
Morbid..........a higher offer than I bid
Nitrates.........cheaper than day rates
Node..............I knew it!
Outpatient..........a person who has fainted
Recovery room.........a place to do upholstery
Seizure..........Roman emperor
Tablet............small table
Terminal illness........getting sick at the airport
Tumor............more than one
Varicose.........near by/close by

There's your lesson in medical terms for the day.

Have a great week!